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Games We Play
When Kenny, a gay activist and leader of his college's LGBT club came home to find a cross hanging on his wall, he was sure his new roommate would make his life hell. But how could he ever hope to defeat that sweet dopey expression on his roommate's face? The man didn't fight fair. |
Excerpt
I had heard about “nightmare roommates” like the big dumb jock, or the super-nerd that dates his computer and never leaves the room, or the scary Goth that pretends to worship Satan to scare their conservative roommate. All these things I was prepared for. But nothing could have prepared me for Patrick. Upon entering my room, the first thing I noticed was my roommate’s very nice ass, he was bent over emptying a box. As he stood up I let my eyes run over him. He was about 5’9, short dusty blond hair with a nice firm build. I dropped my backpack on my bed, which is when he realized I was there. He turned to me smiling, flashing the whitest most perfect teeth I had ever seen and he reached out his hand to shake mine. He had a firm grip. I was liking this. I was liking this a lot.
“Hi, my name is Patrick.”
“Hi, I’m Ken...” That is when I saw it. On the wall directly across from my rainbow flag was a painting of Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. “…ny.” I was prepared for a lot. I was not prepared for this. Before I could say anything else his parents came in. They both introduced themselves to me then helped Patrick unpack. I sat on my bed watching what had to be the universe’s cosmic joke. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I imagined. Maybe he wasn’t that religious.
As his mother hung his clothes in the closet she listed the things he needed to do. “Well, we’ve talked to the pastor here, he seems very nice. You’ll meet him Sunday. Church is from noon until four and the dress code is much looser because you are college students. My baby in college. I think I’m am going to cry again.”
“Mom please, you’re embarrassing me.” He gestured towards me reminding her they weren’t alone.
She looked at me and asked, “So, what church do you go to?”
“None.”
“Oh…” she replied, and then continued with her son’s religious To Do list. “Bible study is on Thursday. Aaron should be here in an hour to show you the campus. I think this is your last bag. Do you have anything else you need to unpack?”
“Nope, I just need to hook up my computer and I’ll be done.”
“Well, your father and I need to get back on the road. Give me a kiss. Take care of yourself.”
Half of my room was covered in Christian paraphernalia. I tried to read, but Patrick felt a need to talk to me.
“Where are you from?”
“New York.”
“Oh, I have family from there. What do your parents do?”
“Child psychologists.”
“Really? Both of them?”
“Yes.”
“Wow…that’s weird. My dad runs a factory and my mom is a homemaker. That must have driven you crazy having your parents analyze you all the time.”
Explaining my relationship with my parents required more words than I was willing to use, so I simply answered, “Yep.”
I was finally saved by a knock at the door. Patrick’s friend Aaron had arrived to show him the campus. Aaron took a quick look around the room and remarked on how interesting it was. After they left, I went back to reading my book and wondering how long it would take me to find a new roommate. I considered making a pass at him. That would send him running.
I had heard about “nightmare roommates” like the big dumb jock, or the super-nerd that dates his computer and never leaves the room, or the scary Goth that pretends to worship Satan to scare their conservative roommate. All these things I was prepared for. But nothing could have prepared me for Patrick. Upon entering my room, the first thing I noticed was my roommate’s very nice ass, he was bent over emptying a box. As he stood up I let my eyes run over him. He was about 5’9, short dusty blond hair with a nice firm build. I dropped my backpack on my bed, which is when he realized I was there. He turned to me smiling, flashing the whitest most perfect teeth I had ever seen and he reached out his hand to shake mine. He had a firm grip. I was liking this. I was liking this a lot.
“Hi, my name is Patrick.”
“Hi, I’m Ken...” That is when I saw it. On the wall directly across from my rainbow flag was a painting of Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. “…ny.” I was prepared for a lot. I was not prepared for this. Before I could say anything else his parents came in. They both introduced themselves to me then helped Patrick unpack. I sat on my bed watching what had to be the universe’s cosmic joke. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I imagined. Maybe he wasn’t that religious.
As his mother hung his clothes in the closet she listed the things he needed to do. “Well, we’ve talked to the pastor here, he seems very nice. You’ll meet him Sunday. Church is from noon until four and the dress code is much looser because you are college students. My baby in college. I think I’m am going to cry again.”
“Mom please, you’re embarrassing me.” He gestured towards me reminding her they weren’t alone.
She looked at me and asked, “So, what church do you go to?”
“None.”
“Oh…” she replied, and then continued with her son’s religious To Do list. “Bible study is on Thursday. Aaron should be here in an hour to show you the campus. I think this is your last bag. Do you have anything else you need to unpack?”
“Nope, I just need to hook up my computer and I’ll be done.”
“Well, your father and I need to get back on the road. Give me a kiss. Take care of yourself.”
Half of my room was covered in Christian paraphernalia. I tried to read, but Patrick felt a need to talk to me.
“Where are you from?”
“New York.”
“Oh, I have family from there. What do your parents do?”
“Child psychologists.”
“Really? Both of them?”
“Yes.”
“Wow…that’s weird. My dad runs a factory and my mom is a homemaker. That must have driven you crazy having your parents analyze you all the time.”
Explaining my relationship with my parents required more words than I was willing to use, so I simply answered, “Yep.”
I was finally saved by a knock at the door. Patrick’s friend Aaron had arrived to show him the campus. Aaron took a quick look around the room and remarked on how interesting it was. After they left, I went back to reading my book and wondering how long it would take me to find a new roommate. I considered making a pass at him. That would send him running.